Today is one of those days where I suddenly realize how lucky I am to understand, intuitively, how wonderful it is to want to voluntarily eat right and workout. It was something that developed out of a healthy habit last summer and then became my lifestyle. For some reason, today, I'm really feeling a whole bunch of gratefulness for life as I know it. Despite it being a Monday (ha!). I think perhaps the Boston Marathon has something to do with my cheerfulness...
So - I have some confessions to make in this blog post. Well, one confession, and its a pretty big (for me). As you know...per my Friday post...I decided to give my badly aching left knee and legs a 7 day rest from running. Something that I was very torn up about. Something that nearly reduced me to tears when the weather was glorious this weekend and perfect for a run...but I knew better. Instead, this weekend, as I promised myself I worked on cross training. I managed to complete all my workouts for the Holly Perkins Challenge and went to the market and bought foods that sustain me in a way that is needed. I was and am proud that I held true to doing what I said I would do over the weekend. That said, I recognized in the process that although I have not run in 5 days (5! that's long for me!) - I felt my adrenaline pumping on the elliptical last night. No...it is not the same runner high...it can NOT compare to running...but I found that part of who I am now is someone that needs some intense cardio in her life. I discovered that this need is NOT strictly associated with running, it is associated with the amount of health-full energy that exists in my body and NEEDS to move with some sort of intensity.
This, for lack of a better expression, blew my mind. Seriously...learned something completely new about myself. Which, somehow, took the pressure off of running for me. I realize, this is not about just running, it is about who I am and continue to transform into, which is a result of - yes, my love and passion for running, but also my love and desire to challenge myself and step up physically be it cardio or strength training. I think perhaps my running has actually ENCOURAGED these aspects in my life and in myself. I think the running has been a way for me to prove to myself I am capable of so much more. And as a result, it feeds back into knowing my body must be cared for to keep meeting those goals and challenges. I fear that I'm not conveying this realization clearly. Ugh! I guess the easiest way to say it is...although I MISS running, I realized that I can survive through a short hiatus (notice i said "short"!) as long as I'm continuing to push myself (in a healthy way) and push my boundaries physically.
And in light of this realization...I may actually give myself 10 days off from running. But we will see how the knee and legs feel after 7. Its just so bizarre to me...I'm having such a clear picture of how running fits into my life, and how it fits into how I want to train and develop my body. Do not read me wrong, I WANT to run...but I don't want to run through injury, I don't want to find myself begging for a finish line - I want to show up at the June 10k ready to go and feeling strong. I want to follow a real plan during the summer for my 13.1 half marathon in September. I am vowing, right here and now, to continue to cross train. To continue to press on and get out of my comfort zone...because running became a comfort zone for me...and I think that was the problem.
That problem is now corrected. Clarity is a wonderful thing. And who knew it would come to me during a time when I am choosing not to run.
So...I guess that's all I got for you on this happy Monday. A post dedicated to my non-running confession - which for some may not seem so groundbreaking but for me...I never saw it coming. I am enjoying this time off and look forward to returning to it at the end of the week...but the bigger picture here is about my whole body, not just how fast my legs can take me (or not take me!).
Oh...one more thing...as expected, the Holly Perkins Midsection Challenge is doing a helluva good job on my bod. Only with her workouts do I start to see big results all over. This may not look like much but i'm damn proud of that little bicep forming! I noticed it when I was crimping my hair this morning...I wasn't even flexing when I noticed it...! had to capture it (yes, I'm a geek!).
stay strong!
Rachel
nice guns!!
ReplyDeletexxoo